Liberty wrote:I have told her I have the gene but she seems not to want to know about it or what she could do diet wise. It is upsetting to see the future unfolding with no ability to change it.
What a great name you've selected! It's a sign of your concern as a brother that you are worrying about your sister.
I'm sure you'll get lots of helpful advice over the next day or more, but will offer my perspective as a 65 year old 4/4, with two older sisters and a younger brother. My parents were at least a 3/4, so it's possible that my siblings range from 3/3 to 3/4 to 4/4. All seem cognitively okay now. Since our mother and 4 of her sisters died with (if not from) dementia in their 80's to early 90's, and our father died of cardiac arrest at age 67, we have some pesky genes on both sides.
None of my siblings,to my knowledge, know of their ApoE status and I have decided, after much thought, to say nothing to them. Two of them are very active, healthy weight, engaged in multiple challenging projects and follow most of Dr. Bredesen's basic advice without having read his work. The oldest has had serious life-long mental health issues and has repeatedly refused all mental health and medical advice, currently living as a severe hoarder. But she has chosen that life and when I talk with her, she expresses that she is happy. It's not up to me to confront her with the choices she has made, nor is doing so likely to have any effect other than jeopardizing one of the few relationships she has left.
As many others on this site will attest, there is no "un-knowing" that you have a significantly increased risk of mild cognitive impairment or dementia by age 85. (A March 2017 meta-analysis puts the risk for a 4/4 at between 30-60%, noting that lots of other factors make the range so wide.) Even if our risk is the same, my healthy siblings are entitled to seek out, or not seek out, the readily available information on their risk.
It's possible that the memory changes you see in your older sister are due more to temporary effects of the drop in estrogen after menopause, and not early warning signs of cognitive impairment. It's also possible that they are linked somewhat to her car accident, although a "head injury" does not necessarily mean a permanent "brain injury."
You could share with her a copy of Dr. Bredesen's book, with just the encouragement that his "plugging the holes in the roof" approach seems like an interesting way to approach being in your 50's and 60's. I guarantee you that she knows her diet isn't as healthy as yours, but maybe it also is her way of coping with some of the stresses she feels in her life. Be "present" for her and let her know you love her. She will thank you for that for the rest of her days.