Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Newcomer introductions, personal anecdotes, caregiver issues, lab results, and n=1 experimentation.
marthaNH
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Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by marthaNH »

I know I'm not the only one here who alternates between intense periods of reading/experimentation and other times when I just need to lighten my load a bit, and step away from tracking, supplements, and this weird inward focus. I'm in the intense phase at the moment.

I have just recently noticed a little too-far-down-the-hole behavior in myself that I think is the result of having to change meds for my blood pressure situation. I don't trust my doctor to catch differences between drugs that don't matter to most people, but might to me. So that's been on my mind. I also don't trust her to recognize when my individual situation justifies departing (just a little) from one of her family practice guidelines. Of course, the worry and emotions do my BP no good.

Three times recently I have done something weird for me, and that is order supplements that I haven't really done due diligence on. I also recognize a little weirdness (OCD? retail therapy? impulse buying? magical thinking?) in this pattern. So I would just like a reality check from anybody who has any knowledge or experience of these recent purchases.

1. The only one I feel like I've read up on properly is Theracumin HP from Integrative Therapeutics. I followed a recent thread on that and purchased it a while back. So maybe that doesn't qualify as an impulse buy.
2. I don't know why I bought GLA except that it was on sale from a familiar source, I had heard of it, and it is supposed to be both anti-inflammatory and maybe good for skin issues. I have basically undiagnosed rashes that I think are triggered by stress. Psoriasis? Eczema? Only diagnosis I ever got was "chronic idiopathic urticaria" which didn't tell me a lot. Twenty years ago I managed the first-and-worst such outbreak with antihistamines but don't take those any more. Should I take such a supplement without a better reason?
3. This morning I saw the study on the new high-priced MitoQ that supposedly addresses the availability problem of CoQ10. I've been taking Qunol Mega Q10, which is said to be water and fat soluble and therefore higher absorption. But the study seemed to show results in people just like me, and what happened was that it relaxed their blood vessels, which is my issue. But instead of setting it aside, doing my work, and coming back to it, I jumped on the bandwagon like everybody else and pulled out the credit card like I was made out of money. Just not like me.

That's what I really wanted to ask you guys. Beyond that, I'm hanging out on the site a lot because I enjoy the company of others dealing with the same issues. I know it's all a gamble, and all that.

The other thing I suppose I ought to mention is that I had a scary reaction to emotional upset last October that my doctor decided not to worry about once it passed. It had to do with a work issue -- I had to agree to take on a temporary (3 months) doubling of my work load, long story. I agreed, because I have a kind of Mighty-Mouse complex ("Here I come to save the DAY!") and because it was the prudent thing to do. This is the job that pays for my health insurance. But after I agreed to do it, I then had to go through a charade of acting like I had applied for the job, which meant a full academic dressup and tap dance, interviews and presentations in front of deans of a school I had worked for the last seven years -- teaching the same courses as this extra workload -- when I already was facing major disaster cleanup. (A teacher was fired mid-semester. I had to take over. She left no records.) This pointless demand on my time -- and I guess there was an element of humiliation since nobody even pretended it was going to continue after the end of the semester -- just floored me. I lost an entire night's sleep and was a basket case. At one point, I came up the stairs from the subway and had to just sit down on the pavement and call a car service to come get me. The 8-mile hiker couldn't make it six blocks home. It was several days before I felt right again. Felt a lot like a time a few years ago that I overdid the weight loss/ fasting/ workout/ ketosis routine and "hit the wall." It took about a week before I was really myself again.

So yeah. Obviously I need an intervention on the stress business. I also have a close relative with rage issues and a new AR-15, but we might as well just not go there. Thanks for listening, guys. I know I'm reacting way out of proportion to actual events. Just figuring out how to get myself back between the lines.
Last edited by marthaNH on Mon Apr 30, 2018 10:51 am, edited 1 time in total.
Orangeblossom
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by Orangeblossom »

I am no expert on these things but something resonated in your post with me. I think with the work stress issue, it sounds quite overwhelming, especially if you have health issues going on, to face such a stressful time, and it's maybe not surprising you responded like that. I think it sounds like you are self aware and that is a good thing. Kind thoughts, I do similar myself with the supplements at times, but again, the way you are aware is good, I think, some of those things may help. I heard Co-enzyme Q12 is good and Curcumin as well, and it isn't like you think one thing in itself is a magical cure. It can be really overwhelming all the different supplements and things, which to prioritise. I keep reminding myself it is the free things, which might help the most, such as exercise, sunlight (vitamin D!) and intermittent fasting.
marthaNH
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by marthaNH »

Orangeblossom wrote:... something resonated in your post with me. I think with the work stress issue, it sounds quite overwhelming, especially if you have health issues going on, to face such a stressful time, and it's maybe not surprising you responded like that. I think it sounds like you are self aware and that is a good thing. Kind thoughts, I do similar myself with the supplements at times, but again, the way you are aware is good, I think, some of those things may help... I keep reminding myself it is the free things, which might help the most, such as exercise, sunlight (vitamin D!) and intermittent fasting.
Thanks. Yes. Thanks.
anne from california
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by anne from california »

Also no expert on much of this, but certainly an expert on the going-too-hard-and-hitting-the-wall routine. And the saying yes to work crap that not only doesn't serve me in the short term, but later comes back later to bite me in the keister. (For example, agreeing to do a project myself to avoid our having to pay a contractor, but then later being told to base a new budget on the lesser amount we paid out the first time!) I've bought supplements I don't end up taking--because I forgot why they were important. (NAC and ashwaghanda, anyone?) I've bought ingredients that went bad because good intentions on Sunday meant rotten dandelion greens on Friday, or good intentions in September meant out-of-code almond flour in April, when I rediscovered it. Self awareness is a good thing, until you're microanalyzing every shred of your personality with a perfectionistic eye--that's when I start getting into trouble. I'm in a testing phase right now--23andMe, bloods, NutrEval--and so much new information will be revealed in coming months, and I'd like to be able to come at it with a balanced approach. Your post definitely resonates!
60 years old, ApoE 3/3, mother and grandmother have/had late-onset dementia, eager to save brain and optimize health.
Thank you all for sharing your knowledge!
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TheBrain
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by TheBrain »

Martha, your recent purchases and how you came to make them are more like how I operate by default. When I started my Muses Labs protocol, I just went ahead and bought and started all the many recommended supplements at once. I didn’t research them all at the time. I have since researched some of them, but I don’t think to the degree that you typically do. Fortunately, I don’t react to supplement ingredients. I just end up wasting money from time to time.

The thing that matters is what works best for you. If you are having financial challenges, of course that would factor in. Are you tired of going down the rabbit hole on everything and your (unaware) way of allowing yourself off the hook is to make these impulse purchases? Or do you need to reign yourself in with such purchases because you really do prefer doing exhaustive research before making such decisions?

I think it’s great that you reached out to your community for a reality check. However, I’m wondering if going inward might help you right now. When I’m feeling rattled and overly stressed, I’m best off sitting in my recliner and meditating. That’s when I gain clarity. Maybe walking or hiking is your type of meditation.

I don’t think you’re crazy whichever way you go, but it sounds like you’ve recently been under an unusual amount of stress. Be extra kind and forgiving with yourself.
ApoE 4/4 - When I was in 7th grade, my fellow students in history class called me "The Brain" because I had such a memory for detail. I excelled at memorization and aced tests. This childhood memory helps me cope!
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SusanJ
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by SusanJ »

Hugs, Martha. Stress makes us do crazy things, like grab on to something that might help us feel better, like a fistful of supplements.

The reality is that sometimes our bodies remind us that we can't sustain some pace/stress/emotional burden. I usually get sick with a cold, but your brain might have said, "Enough! I just need you to sit down right now, on the pavement." It raised the red flag, so take heed, go easy on your self and if you can, get out that credit card and find a Mindfulness Based Stress Relief class. It's got research behind it, and could be a game changer to get into the regular habit of mindfulness.
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Stavia
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by Stavia »

Sounds pretty normal to me!
Things I would do when Im tired and stressed.
Don't fret.
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by Searcher »

Martha,

It's normal to feel how you do from time to time. But it's not helpful to pretend that the purpose of life is to avoid Alzheimer's or CVD.

Those are worthy aims, but they don't bring the joy and fulfilment that most of us crave. Paradoxically, stressing about getting every last detail of a preventive protocol right can have the opposite of the intended effect.

A good enough life is usually joyful enough. A perfect life (or rather the attempt to be perfect) can be miserable. And that doesn't help.

This is something each of us can confirm by simply trying to be more or less self-accepting. There are, of course, studies that explain the biology. But one can do something fulfilling without needing to dive into the molecular basis of everything.

Take care, live a little.
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Sara
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by Sara »

Great post Searcher! :D
Certified ReCODE 2.0 Brain Health Coach, MOCA Certified
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Stavia
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Re: Lost in the rabbit hole -- want a reality check.

Post by Stavia »

Searcher wrote: But it's not helpful to pretend that the purpose of life is to avoid Alzheimer's
exactly. This is the most important thing I have read on the boards this week.

Lets all think about our purposes.
Mine is to live my life with joy and passion, do my best, strive for excellence, but have fun. To value relationships. To try and make decisions rationally, ethically and justly. To face obstacles with courage.
Certainly my purpose is not to count my saturated fat grams each day.
Yes of course I do my best to follow a reasonable, prudent diet and lifestyle regime - but that's a rational choice, not fear driven (any more as it was in the beginning).
You will find you place of balance Martha. Include seeking for that balance in your searches.
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