ApoE4.Info

I don’t want them to be positive... truly I don’t. My gut is pathetically wondering why I swam in the shallow end of the gene pool. I’m hopeful you all can understand my strange mixed emotions right now.

I understand how you feel. I’m 4/4, and the only one of my three sisters who has been tested is 3/3. I’m happy for her, but a child part of me feels it’s unfair. Why me?

Yep, my brother is 3/3. Lucky bastard.

but we all have new family here on the site! How fortunate!

What you're feeling is normal.

I resonate with your feelings in a non-ApoE4 context - as a person who is 39 years old, without children, every time one of my younger brothers or a 25-year-old cousin of mine announces their pregnancy. At those times, I feel a weird mix of happiness for them, sadness from wanting children but not having them, and guilty feelings from not being completely overjoyed for these people I love.

At those times, I talk to someone I trust, and then focus on what I can do - for example, in my case, I'm researching methylation and methyl folate therapy for my homozygous MTHFR mutation (and how it relates to childbearing).

You have done well by finding out about your genetics, and doing something about it! And my friend reminded me (today in fact, when I told her about my MTHFR mutation), we all have mutations, so if it's not one, it's another. ApoE4 is one you can do something about!

I think we all can relate. I'm sure that I have siblings and cousins both with a 4 , and some who don't at all have a risk... and I feel the same. There is an issue with me too in that I see my declining mother, and there was an uncle of her's (who had it in his 80s as well), and the two of them were amazing in comparison to so many of the other 80 year old relatives... yet, some get it... while others who are eating terrible food, drinking, smoking... etc... may never get it and live til their 90s.... CRAZY!
This is life though. I truly feel for those people who get the SUPER early kind that comes in the 50s... which isn't related to the APOE4

Thanks for all your responses. I totally feel the love and support. I also loved slacker's comment about having a new family here. So many emotions around Alzheimer's. My mom continues to decline too, Torimintz. She was asking yesterday to go stay with her grandparents for a few days.