rrmolo wrote:Having gotten a lot of satisfaction from helping to care for my father in his last demented years I am resigned to let the play end itself for me. When my brother took him to the nursing home he said "I don't know what these good nuns can do for me here." Well the good nun in about 15 months gave my brother a call re my fathers pneumonia. Between the two they decided not to treat it and allow him to stay in the home and let nature take its course. I had time to make it there and say my good byes. With all the nursing home rules now I wonder it the good nun and my brother would be allowed this latitude.
I had my mother sign a Living Will while she was still "of sound mind" which was by the skin of my teeth and probably done on the last day the lawyer could legally allow it. We also had a Do Not Resuscitate order and I had Durable Power of Attorney (I could make medical decisions) that I kept of copy of in my purse. 20 years ago, I had to race in to the hospital after she was transported for a fall to run interference and decide if she really needed to be poked and hooked up to machines or if a kiss on her boo boo would suffice. Over the course of 10 years, I was gratified to find that attitudes had started to change and quality of life was the concern rather than just saving a life. If we could improve her quality of life, by all means we took measures. When she developed aspiration pneumonia and it was clear that this was probably going to be "it", the Palliative Care & Hospice Teams showed so much love and respect to her as she took her time to pass over (in her care facility) that I am eternally grateful for them. I'm not sure how rules have changed either but for me, getting the legal paperwork done in the early stages allowed for a more peaceful transition. I'd like to have the option of euthanasia but I'm not sure that I could "pull the trigger".