Changing Habits

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circular
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Changing Habits

Post by circular »

I suspect almost all, if not all, of us have some habit, if not many habits, that we struggle to change. Just in case anyone else finds it useful, I've been listening to Gretchen Rubin's audiobook Better Than Before while exercising. Before this I brushed up online on her 'four tendencies' to lay the groundwork. These are her general types of people according to how, and in some cases, whether, they meet external and internal expectations. I'm not a big fan of "personality types," but I find her in-depth examination of this topic to be very revealing and helpful, uncovering a sort of 'architecture' of habit formation and maintenance according to these four tendencies.

One of the four tendencies appears to be well represented among posters here, including me: the questioner. I've been looking at how this tendency often sabotages my ability to implement habits I know I need to develop or improve. And then there's the rebel tendency, my accomplice, as I watch the upholders and obligers meet all kinds of goals and succeed in ways I thought I could only dream of. Not that there aren't advantages to being a questioner and/or rebel, but what Gretchen does well is discuss the advantages and disadvantages of all four tendencies and how to make them work in the context of habits.

Given the many habits that need changing to lay the foundation for good cognition through life, this seems like a topic worth getting a lot clearer about, instead of just lobbing it in the 'willpower' bin for better or worse.
ApoE 3/4 > Thanks in advance for any responses made to my posts.
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SusanJ
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Re: Changing Habits

Post by SusanJ »

circular wrote:Given the many habits that need changing to lay the foundation for good cognition through life, this seems like a topic worth getting a lot clearer about, instead of just lobbing it in the 'willpower' bin for better or worse.
I hear you sister Circ. I come from a long line of questioners and rebels, so it has followed me my whole life. Interesting to think about the impacts on my ability to create new habits. Sometimes new habits are easy, sometimes not so much. Would be good for me to pick apart why.

Thanks for sharing.
circular
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Re: Changing Habits

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SusanJ wrote:Would be good for me to pick apart why.
The good thing is that Gretchen has done a great job picking it apart, so all we have to do is listen and go, "Oh!" :D If you look into it, let me know your mileage.

One perspective I've found helpful to have her articulate (although it must seem obvious to non-questioners!), is that once I decide on a habit I don't have to think about it anymore. As a questioner I tire my own self with my incessant questions (not to mention others), so these days I welcome the thought of having a reprieve from questioning. It also reminds me of something I read many years ago that stated that one reaches a kind of plateau where more information does not help make better decisions. It would be interesting to find that and look at it in light of today's information overload and often fear-driven efforts to stave off cognitive decline. In some ways becoming a caregiver has helped me default more often to the big picture, since I haven't had time to go down rabbit holes (not that there isn't another kind of value in being a terrier).
ApoE 3/4 > Thanks in advance for any responses made to my posts.
TLS
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Re: Changing Habits

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I just listed to Atomic Habits by James Clear. It's been the most helpful read for me personally in awhile. He advocates making small baby steps to change habits. So far I've applied it to a few things that have been resistant to change and it's working! Plus making progress towards a goal is cheering me up.
apoe 3/4
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dfmcapecod
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Re: Changing Habits

Post by dfmcapecod »

Everything is habit. EVERYTHING. A cue, a ritual, a reward.

I appreciate seeing these habit resources and I would offer up this book, which of reading hundreds if not thousands of books and papers in my life, I consider to be the most influential work I've read on habit. Permitting me to see the world, and myself entirely differently. Because of how much clarity it created for everything from myself, to addiction to the weakness of humankind and how difficult is to actually CHANGE.

For audible lovers - this, which is how I recommend the material:
https://www.audible.com/pd/The-Power-of ... B007C64916

For the written work:
https://www.amazon.com/Power-Habit-What ... 1400069289

For a quick primer which is excellent and teaches the bulk of the framework -
https://charlesduhigg.com/how-habits-work/

If anyone has read Atomic Habits or Better Than Before as well as this one and could give a quick compare that might be helpful.

Anyone who is trying to digest information about health, diet, lifestyle changes and is NOT interested in how habits work is going to have a hard time getting somewhere. They go hand in hand.
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